I would rather fall down 22 flights of stairs
Dear Stupid Bastard;
I heard you coming around a corner today and instead of waiting around and risk spending even 1 minute of sharing air in a confined space, I bolted and took the long way. While I was traipsing all over hill and dale I realized that I’d sooner fall down 22 flights of stairs (because 23 would be over doing it) than have to make small talk with you and listen to your stupid voice and your stupid words anymore than I already have to.
Sincerely,
-Not buying the load of BS that spews from your trap daily